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LATEST NEWS
10/25/04 - SIDEWALK CAFÉ WINS 3:3 - On a blustery day that saw the Rats with a bye, the schedule was moved up as Sidewalk Café faced FC . Sidewalk started this rainy day with a scant eight men against a full side from FC . Excuses were plentiful from the late-comers, but that didn't help matters. The Big Donkey - who isn't on the roster but still showed up on time - filed the following report:

    By the way, fantastic effort by the Sidewalk lads on Sunday (those who showed up). Eight men, Charlie in goal with a bad hammy . . . subsequently went 2:0 down in the first 15 minutes.

    After reinforcements came (take your time Gregory, no rush) the lads rallied from 3:1 down to get a point out of the game. Stanley made it 3:2 [84'] after a quality ball from the Pensioner, Kevin Smith, and then with about 3 minutes to go, McCown went on one of his expeditions . . . a great move saw Rob Duke cross from the left, Junior controlled, swiveled, stumbled and then laid the ball back to an onrushing Derek who finished well.

    Way more entertainment than the Arse-Man U game or the Milan derby if you ask me.

  • 10/21/04 - $$$, $$$, $$$ - All league fees are due Friday October 22. We still have about $2,000.00 to collect. Please take care of this.

    The Fan Rats beat up on Big Nasty 5:1 at Dorey. Still waiting for Donkey & Roach's match recap.

    Sidewalk Café let slip away a two-goal lead to tie the always-fragrant Italians 2:2.

    Rat Masters crushed Renaissance 10:3 to make up for last spring's 1:4 shellacking.

    Rat Masters then followed up with a mid-week, rain-shortened 2:1 victory over Blast HC to go to 7-0-0 in the Masters Division.

    Summaries had to be kept brief this week, as we are charged by the word. And there is still about $2,000.00 to collect.



  • 10/14/04 - THE WAGON TRAIN ROLLS ON - A Week #5 sweep truns Bryan Park "C" into a mutual football lovefest.

    The morning started with the Rats taking on Metro Sting FC. This was a re-match of the 2002 MDCVSA Challenge Cup Final, won by the Rats 3:2 in overtime on The Pensioner's golden goal. In commemoration of the event, the boys dressed in their "throwback" white Lotto jerseys that were worn on that fateful championship day in June of '02. Luckily the average waistline of the current Rat squad was less than the '02 edition, which came in handy since the strips had shrunk over the last two years. Metro Sting FC commemorated the event by showing up with eight men. The result was predictible - 11:1 - with the outmanned Sting running in circles through a constant barrage of Roachie's constant unintelligible banter. The win was the 36th consecutive CVSA regular season victory, and 39th consecutive without a loss.

    Sidewalk Café was coming off of a 0:3 drubbing at the hands on redneck Chesterfield FC. Never seen a bunch of twenty-somethings talk so much smack in the Second Division - all of the other twenty-somethings in the league are in the Premier Division; I guess Bubble-butt #43 and Roscoe P. Coltrane #25 need to hone their games a bit. And remember that 2nd shift at McD's starts right after gametime on Sunday's. Anyway, Sidewalk faced Richmond Battery - no real history with these lads. Battery battered first with a tight angle shot to go up 1:0. Jimmy Gill placed a beautiful push pass across the box to the far post to equalise [British spelling] at 1:1. An unnamed Rat defender then made a 90-yd. run, received a beatiful through-ball from Gilberto Béjarano, faked out at least seven defenders, did four spin moves, and lofted a rocket into the upper 90° [we think so . . . ] to bring the tally to 2:1. 1990 CVSA MVP Jimmy Gill once again breached the scoresheet with a point-blank rocket of a cross to bring it 3:1. After the Battery pulled one back, Franchesco "Ricki" LoPresti tippy-toed one into the nets to conclude matters at 4:2. Sidewalk Café is off to a 4-1-0 start in stark contrast to their dismal Spring '04 campaign.

    Rounding out the slate were the Rat Masters. The opponent - Burtyboy and userers from Capital One Classic. From the outset it was CVSA Fall '03 MVP Jeff Oberg who kept the Masters in the match with an incredible display of acrobatics between the pipes to keep the telemarketers at bay. Finally age was served as two of the original Rats - Daniel Salomonsky & Johnny X. Giavos - hooked up on a corner kick to get off to a 1:0 lead. Although this correspondent was dismissed from the park by domestic obligations, word has it that the second stanza was a rout, finishing 5:0 - Aye, matee . . . what's in your wallet?!?"

    After Week #5, the club's cumulative record stands at 14-1-0, with two teams in first place, the other in second. It's a good time to be a Rat. The seond half of the season will bring stiffer competition as well as the CVSA Cup. Buckle your belts, love your teammate, and we shall overcome in October & November.
    THE WANK(s)
    FC was a mouthy lot, being led by some guy with size 13 orange cleats - we'll refrain from the obvious clown references - who rocked home FC 's first goal. After that, Bozo stayed off of the score sheet. Bozo's cousin - red-head Rick #33 - while mouthing off a bit himself, was the missing ingredient of swiss cheese on the defense that allowed the equaliser in the 88th minute. All-in-all a fair result considering that half the squad showed twenty minutes late.

    Honorable Mention goes to Daniel Salomonsky, who thought:
    • The Fan Rats played at 9:00 (they had a bye)
    • Sidewalk played at 11:00 (they played at 9:00)
    • Rat Masters had a bye (they were scheduled for 11:00, but rained out)

    We did like the Bolero jacket, however, Daniel.
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